From Eileen Bailey,
Your Guide to ADD / ADHD.
New Year's Resolutions, for many, these words bring up memories of previous failed attempts at setting and reaching goals. Setting resolutions to start the year off can be a wonderful thing. It shows your desire to improve yourself, your life and the lives of those closest to you. But reaching goals requires planning and follow through, two areas where adults with ADHD often struggle. Understanding the reasons why most New Year's Resolutions fail can help you work through your goals and increase your chances for success.
Reason 1
Goals are over-ambitious.
What type of goals do you normally set? Do you want to lose 50 pounds this year, organize your whole home, or learn a new sport? Maybe your expectations are not realistic.
Try to break down your goals into manageable chunks. For example, maybe instead of organizing your entire home, you want to set a more achievable goal of organizing one room in your home. You can set one goal per month, rather than setting a large goal for the entire year.
Or possibly you can reword your goals, instead of attempting to "lose 50 pounds" this year, reword your goals to "I will start eating healthy during the upcoming year." This way you can start to incorporate changes in your diet, such as switching to low-fat milk or eating more salads with your meals. Changing your habits in this way will allow more lasting change in your life.
Remember, the smaller the chunk, the easier the goal is to attain. Each time you achieve a goal you will be able to set one more small goal, creating a year long quest for improvement, one step at a time.
Reason 2
You are setting goals based on what you think you should want, not what you really want.
Recently, I visited a friend that had a calendar with a column for each of her children. On many days, she had written what each member of the family needed to do. This prevented rushing out the door because she remembered dance class at the last minute, and there was no staying up late to finish a school project because even that was broken down into steps on her calendar. I ended up thinking I should do the same thing in my house.
Although I attempted to follow in my friend's footsteps, I did not accomplish it. Why? When I first visited my friend, I was not thinking about how disorganized my life was. Although I can't say we all remember everything that needs to be done, we seem to manage okay. My goal was to be "as organized as my friend", even though my own system seemed to work alright for my family.
Setting goals because they work for someone else does not make them appropriate for you. Whenever you try to measure up to someone else's way of life, you are creating goals that are not reasonable. Instead, take a look at your own life and decide what area you would like to work on, just for you. Choose this area as a place to start your self-improvement.
Reason 3
Goals are not specific and do not have a plan of action.
Goals, without a specific plan on achieving the goal, are simply wishes. "I wish I was more organized" will not prompt you into action. "I plan on becoming more organized this year. First, I will create a calendar to easily show all the important dates. Once I complete that, I will organize my desk at home, throwing away any papers I no longer need."
The second goal not only prompts someone into action, it provides for a specific sequence of events to occur in order for the goal to be reached. Setting up a specific goal and listing all the steps that are required to reach that goal will help you take one step at a time toward your new self. You need only to concentrate and work on the first step until that is completed, then you can move to the second step.
By writing your goal and the process on paper, you change from wish to goal.
9 Reasons To Become an Evil Super Villain
0 comments:
Post a Comment